Should You Pay for Your Child’s College?

Whatever your family decides about whether you should pay for your child’s college  as part of your household budget is discussed with more detail in the link above. It is entirely your own family’s personal choice. 

The question whether parents should pay for their children’s college has as many answers as the rainbow has colors.  There are quite a few options for families to look at while trying to plan their children’s post high school education.  One size does not fit all.

“College debt can be a financial nightmare for parents who are trying to manage their own expenses while saving for retirement. Financial aid is not created equal, and two colleges with identical costs could offer much different financial aid awards,” explains Velasco.

“Therefore, as students and parents are going through the college search, financial fit is an important aspect to consider when adding colleges to the interest list. Research financial aid options at colleges by reviewing the financial aid pages as well as filling out the net price calculators to get a good idea about the amount of financial aid that may be offered if the student is admitted to the college.” Jessica Velasco from JLV College Counseling.

There are quite a few options for families to look at while trying to plan their children’s post high school education. 

And I should say, “with them”.  The conversation needs to start early with children, if parents are not prepared to pay for college tuition. Some alternative solutions need to be discussed.

Alternative solutions may include:

• scholarships that are offered by many groups and institutions. 
• Children can sometimes do the “Running Start” program, when offered by their local community college and by the time they graduate from high school, they could have 2 years of college under their belts.  This is a great option and can be a virtual probation for what their next 2 years will look like.  That can be part of the conversation, whether parents contribute to the final 2 years or not.

  

• Military service is a viable option for some students.
• Students can also pursue part of their program at a less-expensive community college, while working part-time.

This is the path I took when I went to nursing school.  

There are quite a few options for families to look at while trying to plan their children’s post high school teaching. 

It is worthwhile to remember that a student can borrow money for school, but his or her parent cannot borrow money for retirement.  Paying for a college education may be more realistic for parents who already have significant savings, particularly for retirement.

I believe the policy on federal loans is jaded by the expectation that parents will be paying for college and includes the parent’s income in the mix. This limits choices and can even interfere with grants that the child may be able to qualify for, if their parent’s income was not considered. 

It often seems that the government expect parents to pay the bill for college. Fannie Mae reported statistics that say nearly half of college tuition is paid by the student’s parents.  I do not think these factors in the students that go to college later in life, so the real number is much less.

Once a child turns 18 however, parents have no legal obligation to pay for their child’s expenses.

However, there is an exception. Divorced parents may have a clause in the decree that requires one or both of them to pay for college. Parents have argued that scholarships, grants or parents paying the tuition, often prevents young adults from starting their lives crippled by debt.  And some see a child’s education is an investment, giving them better career options.  

“Start the conversation about college expenses early and have it often”, says Jessica Velasco from JLV College Counseling. “Financial aid is not created equal, and two colleges with identical costs could offer much different financial aid awards,” explains Velasco. “Therefore, as students and parents are going through the college search, financial fit is an important aspect to consider when adding colleges to the interest list. Research financial aid options at colleges by reviewing the financial aid pages as well as filling out the net price calculators to get a good idea about the amount of financial aid that may be offered if the student is admitted to the college.”

Parent’s Stories:

One parent commented, “I attended a service academy for college and had a “free” education. However, my “debt” was TIME, not money. I had a commitment to serve in the military after graduation. I then went to med school on Uncle Sam’s dime and tacked on even more time commitment. A time commitment can be as much a burden as financial debt in many respects. Either way, you learn the value of the education intimately over the years”.

One mother noted, “One thing that I think is critical is early communication and expectation management. It’s not like this arrangement came as a surprise. I’ve been telling my son his entire life that I’d be cutting the cord at 18. And I made my own way in life. And I wanted him to do the same.

Of course, I’m here for guidance, advice, and moral support, and I gave him probably 100 hours of my time with navigating the college admissions process.

I joke that if he’s ever down and out and wants to move back in he’s welcome to. But there will be such painful rules and curfew that he’ll be very motivated to get back on his feet”. 

My Own Story:

I was a single mother working as a nurse in a nursing home. And my first three children graduated from high school.

My youngest son was injured in his early teens and does not have a higher education. However, he has a high school diploma, and we are all very proud of him.

Secondly, my oldest son joined the military when he was 20 to become a medic. A couple of years later, he deployed to Afghanistan as a Navy Corpsman, and field medic for the U.S Marines.  He now serves as a paramedic firefighter, in Huston, Tx. His son has giant shoes to fill, or should I say boots?

There are quite a few options for families to look at while planning their children’s post high school education. 

My youngest daughter went to trade school and earned a diploma for Physical Trainer.  It seems to be her calling, along with being a single mother of my amazing granddaughter. 

My oldest daughter went to college on student loans, money gifts from family members and graduated with a nursing degree. She is now a Registered Nurse. She is currently working as a Covid-19 nurse in eastern Washington. 

I am very proud of all of my children and the educational path that we took together.  

Parents know what is best for their families.  Talk about it together and the earlier the better. Clear expectations will go a long way.  I made a free downloadable savings record for you. It is simple and has a fun design and is totally do-able for even a young teen. Make as many copies as you want. 

Check some of our other posts and find more matching printables.

You can download it           HERE

If you have something to contribute to this article or have a story of your own, please join the conversation.